Friday, October 30, 2009
I'm Just Being Honest
It has been an emotional week for me. We went to a memorial service at the hospital where I delivered Madelyn last Sunday. At the service, we were asked to say some gift that our babies gave us--- something that we are thankful for. If I am being honest with myself, I have to say there isn't one. I could say that I appreciate my son more, but I would still love and care for him even if I hadn't gone through her loss. Sam says at least we know about my conditions, but I would rather have my baby girl and so would he. Is it really fair to ask me to be thankful for something so horrible? Each and every day, I feel forced to look on the bright side. I was kind of hoping for one hour of my life where I could just feel sorry for myself.
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((hugs)). i'm sorry you're having an especially tough time.
ReplyDeleteHi Jess -
ReplyDeleteI found your blog on the babyloss directory. I'm so sorry to read about all your losses. I also lost a baby at 18 weeks, and one at 21 weeks. Wishing you happier days ahead.
Annie
I definitely know the feeling. Sometimes you don't feel like "being grateful for what you have." I'm sorry that the service didn't give you the comfort that you were probably hoping for.
ReplyDeleteI found your blog through the miscarriage, stillbirth and infant loss directory. I also have a 2 1/2 year old and have had 3 miscarriages since he was born. Feel free to visit my blog if you wish.
http://whitepicketfence2point5kids.blogspot.com/
{{{hugs}}}
ReplyDeleteI am sorry for your loss.
(I found your blog on the Miscarriage, Stillbirth and Infant Loss Directory.)